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Postcard No. 3

As a family we have had a hell of a month, busy both in our private lives and at work with a mixture of good and bad things to deal with, much like all young families really. We know this is likely to be you too reader, because the vast majority of our customers are young families just like us, and it is why you come to us, because we designed WPN to fit our own young family and then hoped others would like it too. We fenced the entire perimeter of the land so if any of us take our eye off the youngsters, chances are they will be fine, and went on from there.

We are currently laying the patios, on top of which will sit large and permanent canvassed gazebos, heated by infra-red lights when in use. But before then I hired a digger to trench in lots of electric and internet wiring, making the place look like the Somme for a few days, and it felt like carnage. But I know that this will future proof us for all sorts of interesting things like outdoor lighting and connectivity for various bits of tech we plan to introduce. You have to break eggs to make a pancake, as the saying almost goes!

The great thing about the heated gazebos is that you will now be able to book in kids parties knowing that this excellent facility is available (right next to the playpark) in the event the indoor restaurant is busy, so effectively you will likely have the choice (on the day) of indoor or outdoor, however worst case scenario, your kids will be undercover, heated etc. right next to the playpark. I will add that in the event that terrible weather is forecast, then we will of course reserve a room inside for you. In general though, kids want to be outside, playing.

By the end of January, we will have dedicated party function rooms completed in addition to the gazebos, allowing us to host as many parties as you can throw at us, and we will be introducing a charitable scheme funding parties for disadvantaged kids (I have already written about this before so won’t repeat myself again here until we go live with it in the coming months).

We are chuffed to have been able to announce our opening 7 days a week even through the winter, and I will continue to design the outdoor areas to increasingly give the impression of an endless summer, with plants like Camelia taking centre stage, flowering as they do through the winter months, and unusual evergreen trees like various forms of Acacia and Eucalyptus to name but a few. In addition we will continue to add interesting sculptural structures, seating and sheltered areas to make it genuinely pleasant to be outside in the winter if that is your preference, as it is mine. This is Cornwall after all, and as such our temperatures can accommodate such ambitions, so why not?

As a boy I loved playing in and around ponds, collecting newts and frogs etc. and so do our boys now, so I excitedly used the digger to dig a large pond in the forest area (centre of the car park) being careful to tier my way down in order that if a small child somehow gets over the large logs in front of it, the first tier is shallow enough for the child to simply climb out again. It is big enough for hundreds of multi coloured goldfish, similar to the pond at Kimberley park, Falmouth, and I can’t wait to finish it in the spring.

Next door to it will remain the small existing pond, but we will move the fish from it to the big pond, and introduce amphibians to it (fish would otherwise eat the eggs and tadpoles etc.)

I have also now identified where a small glasshouse will sit, in which will live tortoises and snakes (separated!) and your kids will be able to view them from outside, with the weekends also featuring animal hours hosted by Nicholas who will teach kids about all the animals, feeding the snakes too, which is a bit scary, but very exciting.

Anyone who knows Nick will be in little doubt he will excel at this task despite him only being 7 come the summer, and he will be learning more about the animals himself over the coming months to make the sessions as good as possible for your youngsters.

We will be building an outside large pizza oven, wood fired, and this will effectively make us a Pancake and Pizza venue from the Summer holidays onwards. They won’t be any old pizzas either. They will be of the highest quality and made using the traditional Italian ways, and if you want to help us out in this regard, perhaps you can, as we are looking for an Italian chef by the name of “Simeone”. He used to work for Zizzis in Falmouth before it closed during Covid, and he was brilliant with both pizzas and kids. He would grab our kids and get them making little pizzas when it was not too busy there, and he is exactly the kind of chef we need. Unfortunately our attempts at tracking him down have been as yet unsuccessful, so do you know him? Can you put us in contact? Last we knew he was living in St Austell, but we have a great opportunity for him and hope to tempt him over here.

In other news, I have improved the rabbit accommodation, digging an underground warren using a galvanized tunnel and warren system which I insulated on all sides. I spent forever making it just so, finally installing the underground tubing leading from ground level to the warren, using some left over chimney liner which is perfectly ridged to give bunny purchase as they make their way up or down. But here came a comedy moment, because I had my x 2 middle aged man glasses on the whole time, and I forgot about that fact, so when I finished the job, I looked at my work, and satisfied, I let bunny out of the run and into the new accommodation with access to the new warren, and at that point I saw the bunny and thought “Blimey, she’s massive!!” Then I realized it was my glasses, so I took them off, looked at the now dug in chimney liner and realized the damn thing was 4 inch diameter not 6 inches!! I was certain the rabbit would not fit, and my worst fears were realized when she crammed her fat behind down the tube but then never re-appeared!! I was certain she was stuck somewhere in that tube, and the irony of death by kindness was weighing heavy when after 4 days she finally came back out (to my utter relief). I do not know what she was doing down there for 4 days, but it kinda shows she not only fits just fine, but she likes the place too because I see her using it regularly now. All that is now left to do is predator proof the outdoor run, leaving us able to give 24hr access to it, and then we can introduce some friends to her. (in line with the recommended methods of additional bunny introduction). Bunny also got a new above ground accommodation, and it all leaves me feeling very happy, if not a bit tired of all the digging.

I will leave you with this thought, and it involves the Fry Up Crepe Pancake meal. You must have it, and I stress that you should not ask for it with the Triple Stack form of pancakes, no. I appreciate triple stack sounds really cool, but they don’t work with the fry up meal, but Crepes really, really do. I’ve been eating them every morning for the last 2 weeks, and they make each day around 36% better, sometimes even 40 if I add brown sauce.

Peace out.

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